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I Didn’t Feel Worthy

At what point do we decide what our value is? When do we accept this idea or concept of what it means to be worthy? Someone’s affection, a nice car, a good job, loving parents? When do we expect those around us to form their own idea of their true self-worth? And when do we see our own? How many heartaches, heartbreaks and negative circumstances will bring us to understand this?

If I had really understood this concept I may have been so much more…it may not have stopped me from doing whatever I wanted to do. I could have reached higher, further, outwardly towards my success. Hey, is this the thing that stopped me? Or did I choose for it to stop me? What is the thing that made me feel that; from such an early time, that I was not worth it. Everyone else had things I wanted: love, health, money, luck, self-esteem…romance. Not me, I wasn’t worthy of these things. Well, so I thought.

I believed that I was not worthy because, well, I really didn’t think that I was. Honestly, I allowed myself to have a ‘half glass empty’ outlook on life. You know the one. A teacher or a professor fills up a glass in the class and asks, “Is the glass half full or half empty?” Of course the answer is both. Both answers are equally scientifically correct. However, if you think of the emotional or human aspect – then it is a real eye opener. Because with a negative mindset the answer will be that the glass is half empty. A positive mind will usually see the joy in it, and say that the glass is actually half full. Are you with me? Good. Great. Let’s move along…

So, from what point was it that I decided I couldn’t look someone in the eye? At what stage was it that I was not able to be in a conversation; or be seen and not heard? I was nothing but a mistake, an error, an inconvenience. From a very early age.

I am not sure what particular age it was that I became self-aware enough to realize that the stares, the scowls, and the intimidation was from the people who were supposed to help me find the most worth. My mentors, family and my friends influenced what I choose to be. How could I continue knowing any right choices? How do I unmake this bad choice? It was hard to know what I needed to do next, sometimes. When you are a young adult, it is important to know that you are important, and worthy. The people around you are pivotal to everything. They can lift or shape, and even shake your mood, at any given time. So at what point is it that we make the choice to be worthy? The friends and mentors we spend time with have a direct impact on this. If you hang around with; negative, mean, dishonest or unsuccessful individuals, it will definitely ‘rub off’ on you. And you will actually think that you are unworthy…but honestly it’s not your fault. I repeat this, it is NOT your fault. Ok, I promise.

It’s kind of like the law of attraction which says, “what you are seeking is also seeking you.” So if you are seeking happiness, success, fulfilment, love, honesty, and …feel free to add more. You can’t be with people that are not like that. You have to be with like-minded people who also want what you do…then together the attraction can occur, and explode…like amazing fireworks at the 4th of July celebrations!

If you think about a successful person – choose anyone you like. Just imagine them dreaming their dreams and planning their visions. They did not let other individuals around them make them lose or give in to their hopes or dreams. They stepped out; sometimes on their own, and away from the negativity….to succeed. And they did it, even despite the hardships.


Melisa Grigg - Head Coach & Trainer

Melisa was stuck in sadness for 15 years, hated her job, was overweight and her relationship had just ended. Melisa inspires people with her story and now teaches how she sorted her life out. She worked out how to be happy and how to lose over 30kg of body weight.  In simple steps she teaches how you can stop procrastinating, find confidence, stop being so sad and finally start to find true meaning and purpose in your life.

Unfortunately, finding like-minded individuals can be difficult. But, if you look hard enough it is actually quite easy. Pinpoint these people in your mind. Purposely spend time with them. They will not make you feel unworthy about yourself at all. They will teach you, inspire you and genuinely care for your needs, passions and welfare, as the great masterpiece of creation that you really are…

So, when I realized this, after a long time of being made to feel unworthy – I was saved. In every sense of the word. Some of my friends; bad role models for me, just had to go. I had to find people that were on the same page as me. People that had the same interests, who desired success, happiness and the other traits of positivity.

So, of course, you need to gain your own worthiness inside of yourself, ultimately. But I can tell you defiantly that the people you spend time with now; will either help or hinder your cause…your life path…your success…or your failure. The grass is absolutely greener on the other side; if the people you are ‘eating with’ now are in any way, shape or form; negative, unloving, mean, ego-driven or unusually selfish. You need to change this, so your worthiness can be savoured, always. Your future depends on it. But deep inside, you already knew this didn’t you?


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