So, I found myself hiding away, distracting myself at any cost; so I could tell people I was way, way too busy. Too busy to give out, interact, join in and generally, just have fun! I even used my kids as an excuse to hide away from men, and I certainly did not date, ever!
I remember this one guy coming up to me at a bar and saying, “Hi!” I totally freaked out, stumbled over my words and turned my back to him. Wow! It was at that exact moment that I realised I had so much fear. Fear deep down inside of me. The unrelenting fear of: being hurt again, making the wrong choices, stuffing up my children’s lives, and actual life itself.
My family at the time; did what they thought was supportive. But, without realising it they were actually hindering me. Constantly stopping me from growing, and deliberately allowing me to continue to live in ‘my own fearful world.’ The one I had created in my very own head. I had of course sought numerous conventional methods to help me move forward; to feel safe within myself again. This took a lot of time. In reality, it was over 5 years with minimal results. I was frustrated, tired and sick of being confined inside my four walls. I was terrified of living in my head, in hell.
I knew deep within myself, in my heart, that I needed to find something. I would have done anything to help. I just wanted to be me; to feel again. Yes. Literally feel, not just the happy and playful emotions, but any other feeling that was not fear-based, isolated or smothered with sadness. Sensuality, love, humility.
People would ask me what I wanted in life… and my answer was always the same. I just want to feel # happy. What was this feeling that had eluded me for so long? Everyone else in the world seemed to have it. I wanted it so desperately too. All the ‘posted’ happy stories and photos; all the messages displayed publicly about how awesome their lives were. I could only (just barely), stop myself from falling into a mess in front of them. All of them. Arrgh! I felt like I was screaming out for answers and help; but no one was listening. No one. I don’t know if they could hear my calls for help, or if they just didn’t want to know about the mess my mind was in. I always thought there must be more to life than what I was experiencing. Please, let it change; now. Life felt so unendingly pointless and so desperately empty. I didn’t understand life anymore, and I began to question everything. Nothing made sense anymore. When would this nightmare end?
I felt so numb and fearful; that every decision I made took hours and hours of deliberating to the point of ridiculousness. So, I could be sure the answer would be 100% correct. One night, I decided that I couldn’t continue the way things were; if not just for me, then for my beautiful kids.
I found myself reaching out to a group, unbeknownst to me at the time, it would be the pinnacle moment my life took a sharp turn. Finally, it happened, in a different, more emotionally healthful and fulfilling way. I faced so many of my fears attending this new found group, right down to leaving my kids and even flying interstate. The skills I learnt were invaluable. The life lessons and friends I gained were unimaginable…it was a massive turning point for me.
I was able to face fears that had held me back in different areas of life; from 30 years ago. Wow! I got to feel them disappear within minutes; to feel the release inside myself, and the tension leaving my body. I got to gain parts of myself back, and that is beyond words. Truly remarkable. To have ‘less than positive’ emotions inside yourself for so long, and for it to be lifted within minutes, is surreal. Then, to finally find someone that says they can do what they say and give you the results, wow, just awesome. More than I could have ever hoped for, or imagined… For those same people to accept you into their community as one of their own, and to guide and support you through all of the ups and downs. Amazing! They also encourage you to be the best you can be too.
So, this is why I would recommend Emotion Academy to anyone. Yes, to any individual who has ever felt the way I did. Not only will you learn skills to help you in life with your emotions, and your kids’ emotions; you will also gain a loving, unconditional community that can’t be replicated anywhere else. And I mean anywhere.
What is it worth to you? To take back control of your own life, and learn how to be happy; truly happy. To feel safe enough within yourself and know that; whatever decision you make from here on in, you will be okay, either way. In despite of the potential outcome!
I wish I knew about this course 10 – 15 years ago. I would sign up again in a heartbeat! Don’t wait any longer to start living your life, today is definitely the day. Ready, set…